What Happens When You Rewrite Your Story?

The last few months have perhaps been some of the most challenging yet.  For a list of reasons I don’t need to get into here, as it is the ebb and flow of life.  But I do feel that it all sort of started with my ankle injury, and just kept going from there.  Like all of a sudden my life was spiraling in ways I didn’t see coming (do we ever?) nor did I understand.  And I’m still trying to process and understand.  But what I HAVE come to understand, is a concept that has shaped my entire being, without me even noticing. 

I have literally been living my whole life in fear.

You might read that and think “Okay, we’re all scared of things, what’s the issue here?”  But the issue is that it has consumed me.  Without me ever really making a conscious choice to let it.  

You see, so much of how we live is the story we tell ourselves.  Whether we are conscious of it or not.  We’ve been conditioned to believe certain things, have a certain outlook.  A lot of times it’s how we are raised.  And I’m not blaming our parents, (how millennial of me) or parental figures, we know they did the best they could.  But things happened or energy  existed that slowly crept into our delicate sponge-like minds and told us loud and clear ‘THIS IS HOW LIFE IS AND IT IS ALWAYS GOING TO BE THAT WAY.”  And so the idea sticks.  And you live your life with this idea for years and years and maybe it even holds you back a bit. Or a lot. The idea that you’ll never make enough money.  Or that you aren’t smart enough.  Or that all people are evil.  Or you can’t do XYZ because XYZ.  It can be anything.  And for me, it’s fear.  Fear of money.  Fear of outcomes.  Fear of the unknown.  Fear of anything that doesn’t go the exact way I pictured it would.  And let’s be honest, I can’t be the only one.  But it has recently occurred to me that I am truly always EXPECTING that fearful outcome to take place.  And whether it happens or not isn’t the point.  The point is, what if I focused on trust instead? 

Trusting that things are working out exactly as they are meant to.  Trusting the Universe.  Trusting that I can make shit happen.  Trusting in the good things coming. Trusting my own knowledge and strength.  Trusting my heart.  

Because if trust exist’s, fear really can’t.  And if we loose the constant fear, we can become what we truly desire.  If you break the pattern of the story you’ve been telling yourself,  what would you do?  Would you live differently?  My guess is yes.  

So I’ve decided to just stop.  Stop living every second in fear of the next.  Saying and doing it are two different things, as it does not come natural to me.  Cue anxiety.  But, it’s something I’m aware of and working towards.  Building TRUST.  My new favorite word. 

So if you don’t like your story, rewrite that shit.  Seriously.  That thing you’ve been conditioned to think your whole life?  It isn’t true.  And it certainly shouldn’t determine how you live. It’s going to take work.  A lot of work.  But if you’re anything like me, and thrive off personal growth (seriously you guys I geek out about this stuff), it will be worth it.  I promise.  

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