What 2018 Taught Me
I think that New Years goals and resolutions can be a tricky situation. Our culture likes to pressure us to use this time to become a perfect human and set a ridiculous amount of standards for ourselves just because it’s a new set of 365 days.
With that being said, I think that setting goals is amazing. It’s the how and why that matters. I like to set intentions and themes for what I want to embody in the coming year. Sometimes goals can come from a place of guilt and lack, if we aren’t careful. And why would you want to go into the new year feeling like you aren’t enough?!
I also don’t think that we need a brand new year to set intentions for our life. BUT, the coming of a new year is a really good time for reflection. To figure out what worked and what didn’t work for you during this time period, and how that will impact how you move forward in your life.
So 2018, you knocked me to my booty then kicked me (a few times) while I was down. I think about this year and my initial response is “What the hell was that?” BUT of course all those painful moments in time add up to growth. And man oh man have I grown. I think back to New Year’s 2017 and I wish I could warn that poor girl of what was coming (and maybe to drink some more wine too)! And also tell her that the magic lies in the tough shit, so to just hold on tight. But luckily I figured that out too. It’s two steps forward and three steps back, but I can say that I’m able to look back at 2018 with gratitude for the high’s AND the even lower lows.
I wasn’t exactly planning on sharing my 2018 lessons with you all. But then I realized, one of my big goals was to remain unapologetically authentic and share so truly from my heart that I speak right to the core of others’. So, here I am. Continuing to share in hopes that there is at least ONE person that is inspired by what I’ve learned and all I have yet to manifest!
Possibly the biggest learning of them all. Want to hear something crazy? I actually wrote this down in December 2017 for my 2018 themes. Okay Universe, I hear you. I clearly didn’t really understand what I was asking for and quite honestly I’m not sure that I even knew what trust meant at that time. This year I was forced to rely on trust time and time again as the unknowns and unexpecteds continued to show up. Some big situations, some smaller. To me trusting means fully surrendering and letting go. It’s a daily practice to CHOSE trust instead of fear, but it’s something I actively work on every single day. It’s a deep knowing that life is happening FOR me, not to me.
It goes along with trust, but in order to trust you MUST surrender. This year I surrendered big time. I surrendered to injuries and attachments to my body and fitness level. I surrendered to selling a home I love. I surrendered to temporarily giving up a lifestyle that filled my heart. I surrendered to rest. A lot of it. I surrendered to fun and less work. I surrendered to more alignment and less hustle. I surrendered to spending more time with myself than I even knew I needed. But mostly, I just surrendered my need for control and learned to embrace the unknown.
This year I realized that I needed the support of the ones I love more than anything. Specifically I learned that asking for help doesn’t make you weak, and to lean on the people that love you is actually a strength. I learned to even lean on strangers-quite literally when I fell and hurt my ankle and a stranger practically carried me up a hill haha! Having the support of a lot of amazing souls is the greatest gift I could ever receive.
»DEPEND ON MYSELF
With that being said, I learned to support myself, too. To trust myself and my decisions more, and to ask myself what I truly want. Not what society tricks me into thinking I want. I learned to spend time alone. A lot of it. And guess what? I learned that I actually LOVED it. I learned that I’ve gone practically my whole adult life not giving myself enough me time, and that I’m actually more introverted than I knew. Self love is big. And I discovered that if you don’t have unshakable self love and respect, not a whole lot can be built. That self love and confidence serves as a foundation for every single aspect of your life.
»GET OUT OF MY OWN WAY
I learned that the things I tell myself matter greatly. It’s not that I had an overwhelming amount of negative thoughts, but that I compared myself to others often and told myself limiting beliefs that held me back in a lot of ways. This is a continuous lesson, that I’ll be bringing into 2019. Especially in terms of my business and passions.
I really learned and accepted this year (specifically in the last few months-thanks Costa Rica) that stress and worry are a complete waste of time. I would’ve handle A LOT of situations differently in the past, had I truly believed this. But, better late than never! Stress and worrying over aspects of things that are out of your control, rob you of the present moment. What even is life if you are always worrying about the future? I’m learning to really be here now. In this very point in time, and see all the abundance and beauty that lies in the present.
Another thanks to Costa Rica life for this one. I like to move quick in all aspects. Constantly be a busy body. It’s literally my natural go to, but this year I really started (read: was forced) to embrace more stillness. I now crave the stillness of meditation. Of just sitting and listening to music. I traded out some intense workouts for long walks, and learned walking is highly underrated. So much happens when we can balance hustle with a slower pace. I learned that I actually have the answers to all my questions, but it requires getting still and silent and slowing down enough to hear them.
»WHAT IS MEANT FOR YOU WILL FIND YOU.
For as much growth that’s happened, it actually feels like 2018 was about 5 years long. I’m going into 2019 with perhaps more unknowns than I’ve ever had at any given point in my life. But, I’ve got big plans for what I want to see happen. The how and details of what that exactly looks like are the unknown, and that’s where the trust sneaks back in.
I’m still mulling over what intentions and themes I’m setting for this upcoming year, and I encourage you to do the same! But remember, make sure they come from a place of love, hope, and trust, as opposed to lack, guilt, and not enough-ness.
What is ONE word you want to embody in 2019? I would love to hear it!!
Happy New Years, friends!